Gifts By Recipient
Gift Ideas For Your Best Friend
Best friends are the easiest people to buy for and the hardest people to impress, because you both already know the jokes. The winning move is not novelty; it is archival. A gift that proves you have been keeping records of the friendship beats anything bought.
Go through the archive
The story everyone still repeats. The phase they pretend did not happen. The advice you gave that turned out badly. This material has been accumulating for years.
Be unflattering, precisely
Between best friends, accurate teasing is the highest form of affection. Vagueness is what would be insulting.
Land one sincere line
One genuine sentence at the end of a page of mockery is what makes people keep these things.
What makes it personal
Use dates and place names. 'The incident in 2019' is funnier than 'that time you embarrassed yourself'.
What we would make
Government-Issued Relationship Report Card — $4.99
An absurdly official two-page assessment of their merits, infractions and continued eligibility — affectionate, specific and very formally typeset.
- A formal report grading their reliability, advice quality and record on group holidays.
- A card issued as an official notice of long service to the friendship.
- A coupon booklet of favours you owe from the last decade.
Also worth considering: Digital Emergency Card & Envelope.
How it works
- Answer a short set of questions about the person — habits, history, the running jokes.
- We write the gift from your answers and show you the finished thing.
- Pay $4.99 once, then download the clean file or send the private link.
Questions
- Is the report card suitable for friends rather than couples?
- Yes, it is the most friendship-friendly of the three formats.
- Can I include a photo?
- The report card supports a photo of the subject.
- Can I print and frame it?
- Yes, it downloads as a two-page PDF.
Ready when you are
About four minutes from here to a finished gift. You see the whole thing before you pay.
MAKE THEIR RELATIONSHIP REPORT